Haven’t been on here in forever but just wanted to take the time to say that I can honestly say I am so happy with my life right now. I love everyone in my life, I have the greatest friends and support system. The people that I thought I’d always be close with but no longer talk to turned out to be for the best. I am closest to some of the greatest friends and people you can find, some still from middle school and some from new high school. School is great, I am close to my teachers, and spring sports season is finally here. Everything is the best that it could possibly be and I just wanted to share.
You know, if you have a reason for a friendship to be over then it’s easy to just move on but when you just slowly drift apart and then just cut off ties completely for no reason it’s confusing and complicated. But today is probably the first time that I’ve had a huge thing on my mind that I need to talk to you about but I’m afraid to. When I think of what I need to talk to someone about, the only person that comes to mind is you. You’re the only person who would remotely understand, would be honest and know what to tell me. And honestly you’re the only person that I could even imagine talking to about it. You know me so well that you know what is best to do for me. You’re not just gonna give me some bullshit advice like anyone else would but actually know what I should do. But then there’s the whole dilemma on are we even still friends? Like part of me feels like we are, we’re certainly not best friends anymore, but I feel like I can still count on you. But the other part of me says no way, the signals and vibes I’ve gotten say nothing but a no, you don’t want anything to do with me. And you’re not so eager yourself to make contact and talk to me anymore so I hesitate on texting you to talk about this. I want your real advice like I know you would have given me a few months ago, but at this point I don’t know if it would be real friend advice or just the fake shit that anyone else would give me. I don’t want to talk if you’re done with me and being friends like you’ve made it seem. But then again maybe you really care but just actually are bad at keeping in touch. It’s so hard to know. I’m walking that fine line right now between friends and strangers with memories and I don’t know what the next step should be and I certainly don’t know whether or not I could talk to you. I really just wish more than anything that I knew your thoughts and how you felt. And I would do anything to go back to how it was last year. But, I’m a realist and I know that can never happen. I just want your advice.
I MISS ALL OF THE PEOPLE THAT I USED TO BE BEST FRIENDS WITH BUT NOW DON’T EVEN TALK TO